C'est souvent seulement par manque d'esprit créateur qu'on ne va pas assez loin dans la souffrance. Et la réalité la plus terrible donne en même temps que la souffrance la joie d'une belle découverte, parce qu'elle ne fait que donner une forme neuve et claire à ce que nous remâchions depuis longtemps sans nous en douter.
Marcel Proust, Sodome et Gomorrhe
No rain, no mist, not even for the last expedition of this summer. High tide, receding. Stiff breeze from SSW, bringing humidity (93%). Arrived around 5 o' clock, which was far too early, seens as the sun didn't rise until 6:45. Time to contemplate dark space. The first drawing was made in half darkness.
Last weekend, visited Kröller-Müller. De Hoge Veluwe is breath-taking. Nature in all stages of growth and decay. Not cleaned up. Could spend a life-time just studying the trees. Have never seen so much moss in one place.
The museum: after revelling in Van Gogh's evolution, it seemed that so many of even his contemporaries, and more so later painters, are mere derivatives, blowing up one single aspect of his work. Happily surprised though, to enjoy paintings from various periods and 'isms'. However, very few equal Van Gogh's sincerity.
A few moments ago, as I shut the front door behind me, I left my parasol and folding chair behind the door and realized that once again, it was for the last time this year. End of summer fills me with dread, and makes me feel damn melancholic. A metamorphosis from butterfly to caterpillar.
Next summer.
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